I am all about small changes. Progessive steps. Organic growth.
But there are times when you wake up and know that its time for a real change.
Its like a seismic boom.
People around you may think you are crazy. You may not understand it yourself… but you know.
And if you fail to trust this feeling, you hand your power away.
Each time you do it – fail to listen to what you know- you become the effect instead of the cause.
Victims don't live dream lives. And I know your intention is not to be a victim.
There are ways to know you are more than ready for a change… you are being shown that you need change. Once you can trust what you know, life expands brilliantly and you wonder why you waited so long to do it!
People come to me to make a change. Some wait until its a crisis of clutter and confusion, and some feel the nagging sense that something isn't right. There are a handful of ways I have come to see the need for change manifest long before the sonic boom. I've seen it in my own life and I have seen it daily in my world.
Here are a handful of ways to know that it is time to make a change that is significant, whether you are supported or not in your decision.
Remember: no one really needs to support you but you!
10 Ways To Know Its Time For A Great Big Exciting Life Change
1. You don't sleep. You know, there are thousands of feng shui sleep tips, holistic sleep remedies and even science to help you to sleep better. If holistic and medical intervention still don't help you to sleep, you may want to look at the things that happened at the time you stopped sleeping.
Can you handle whatever has happened that is keeping your mind and body from restoring itself?
2. You have a health crisis. Welcome to my medical history. Life has taught me that when I don't listen, don't rest, don't speak my mind and don't move toward freedom, a health crisis is waiting for me. Over a month and a half in the hospital has taught me that nothing is more important than listening to the signs that there is an imbalance that needs to be addressed in life. I can look back to all the signs and all the symptoms of each health crisis and can see how I could have intervened… But, because I was not strong enough to advocate for myself in life I fell victim to sickness that took me out of life… as a victim. Do not let this be your history, too!
3. You are frequently overwhelmed. Overwhelm is not a lifestyle, no matter how much we congratulate people who live in overwhelm as a sort of choice. Say no to what you can't do. You aren't meant to take on every challenge in the universe at once.
4. The world feels robotic. If everything is dull and routine, if you can't see your way out of the unconscious patterns, it is time for a change. Being robotic is a short step away from being very sad. Bring color to your life. Step out of the routine and tap into more of what really elevates your soul.
5. You dream about vacation as a fixation. If your life is designed in a way that makes you fantasize about escape- and even escape that you are unwilling to give yourself- it is time for a very big change.
6. Arguments are everywhere around you. Anger usually crops up everywhere when you are inside angry at yourself.
7. You are lying about your life. Telling people you care when you don't is a warning sign that your life is a lie. Telling strange and twisted stories about your life rather than the truth of it is a clear sign that you are not aligned with your purpose.
Staying in relationships, friendships, partnerships, jobs and any environment that you feel the need to lie about is the largest red flag ever.
When a client comes to me and tells me that they have a marriage drained of love or that they quit their job because they can't pretend they were happy when they were misearable — these are the situations where I see that real change is possible.
Seeing things for what they are and being honest about them is the first step to big change. After all, if you couldn't get a diagnosis from a doctor would you go into surgery to see what randomly could be wrong? That's how lots of us have gone through life… randomly pulling threads to make changes rather than honestly facing the core of the problem.
8. It feels like a roller coaster. Up and then down, dramatic lives are nothing to be proud of since the pronounced highs and lows are nothing but stress. Don't romanticize our drama culture. You know what feels bad. Trust it.
9. Anxiety is far too frequent. Anxiety is often confusing… but if it is frequent, you know it is time for a change. There are mysical, emotional and even spiritual sides to anxiety.
10. You talk about making a change non-stop but don't make it! This is the big one: you know exactly what you have to quit, but you can't. My sister would make my father cocktails at noon in Palm Springs and listen to him sip his vodka cranberry and say that he was done with drinking. He died with a .22 blood alcohol level, tragically. When you have big problems… when you can name them… know that there is help. Lots of it. Thousands of resources.
When your needed change is not as pronounced as a clear addiction that you recognize, you still need to make the change. For every time you wait and get 「reasonable」 you press the pause button on your life.
But… that button doesn't work. Life keeps going. And you are missing it.
Take time to see where and how you have given yourself over to fear. We all do it. Its that old adage, 「The devil you know is better than the devil you don't know.」 But that silly saying implies that no matter where you go you will be with a devil. And that isn't true.
Know that you are never wrong when you are creating life that supports your wellbeing. Anyone who tells you otherwise has their own issues and fears to handle far away from you!
Take the steps you know you need to make. For some, its a big change. For others, its a small switch and then another. Reach out and ask for help. Lots of help.
Clear the clutter in your life. Get organized.
Whatever you do, don't ignore what you know. You know so much!
And… I know you can do whatever you dream about doing. I have seen it over and again. Be your own advocate. Be your best friend.
Let yourself have a life you love.
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